i innocently goolge'd rubber boots to try to buy a pair of those kid boots with frog's eyes on them and found out that there is in fact a rubber boot branch of fetishism. check out http://www.rubberboots.f9.co.uk/ if you don't believe me. this world is amazing.

if you can read peter singer's essay on the treatment of calves in order to make veal, and still eat veal, i want to meet you. johhny cash and john ritter are dead. one expected, one unexpectedly. i would rather be john ritter i think.

if you could live a completely self-actualized life, would you? after spending 6 hours with someone who thinks they can (and admittedly is doing a fairly decent job of it) i don't think i would. it takes the mystery out of everything--to the point where interactions with people have to be completely decision based. i think it is right to like you, so i will. no thanks. not for me.

being a "vegetarian" is sort of naive i think, unless you're doing it for purely health-based reasons. because, as with most things, it is not black and white and not as simple as not eating meat. if your reason for not eating meat is that it causes undue suffering to animals, then wouldn't it be better to eat a free-range hamburger made from the meat of a cow killed as humanely as possible, then say eating a non-free range egg from a chicken that spends years of its in a small cage surrounded by its own feces?
yes, you could be a vegan, that would eliminate a lot of the ambiguity, but not completey. say for instance someone spent years of their life, since that is what it would take, designing a single experiment that would require the lives of 20 animals, but could potentially save the lives of even 100 people. is it worth it? then, being a vegan does not answer the question, because being vegan does not mean, i don't think, that you should suffer more than animals.
there is of course the less important factor that you if you are a vegan in this society you will undoubtely suffer more than if you are not a vegan.
if nothing else, the whole notion of specieism is an amazing thought experiment that can consume hours of your time that you would have otherwise spent watching tv and commercials abour flame-broiled whoppers. mmm whoppers.

there is this psychology study (i can't give you the name because i took the psych gre way too many months ago) that basically says that people who have little reason for doing something overcompensate by saying how much they really like doing that thing. so, given the same bad task, the person who is paid less will say that they like doing the bad task more than the person who is paid more.
i don't think that worked on me, or at least money makes things more palatteable.
so, as i sit at work working overtime on a friday night (when there are literally millions of other things i'd rather be doing) i feel better this week knowing that i'm getting paid time and half rather than last week when i just got comp time. the other possibility is that i've just gotten more used to the monotany.
then there is always that woman who had a baby on the red line. standing up. putting the afterbirth in her purse as she ran out of the subway station. somehow that explains nothing, but everything.

for a long time i didn't like eating meat. i preferred it in nugget form or ground up. it made it easier for me to ingest. i didn't think much about this. then, in the last year, i decided eating meat was probably the most blind hypocritical thing i was doing in my life. let me say that in general vegetarians bug me to no end. maybe that was because i felt they were rubbing something in my face, but i do think a superiority complex is easy to develop when you think you are making a decision for moral reasons (this i find is true about religion too, but that is for another day). so i am going to stop eating meat and not develop a vegetarian superiority complex. once/if i am successful at this, i will try my hand at going the next step.

the begginning of writing as much as possible about nothing and often spelling words incorrectly.